What makes people like each other? Part 3

As I wrap up this section and topic of blogs, I wanted to share the part that I feel is most important. Reciprocation

Reciprocation: The definition is a mutual giving or receiving. And this is very relevant for relationships because both people have to be willing to work at it if the relationship is to last. But I'll give you an example just in case you can't think of the application right away.

So you have two people that text each other. Well there are many different kinds of text personalities out there. One of them is the one word answer, the other is the long winded, another is the type that has smiley faces, exclamation marks. And sometimes there are a few mixed together and there are many more types out there. Now when people text each other, they hope that the other one will "reciprocate" what they do. So a girl is sending a text that explains her day, and everything associated with it. It was a long day! And a lot happened! And so she sent it hoping that the guy will understand her day and at least appreciate it. Then the guy sends a text back saying. "Crazy." The girl goes nuts! She took the time to say that and all he has to say is crazy? And since we tend to avoid punishment or doing something that doesn't go appreciated, eventually she won't look into him. That might be after he likes her like "crazy" or is really into her. But she might lose interest in him because he might not show how involved he is, and since he is not reciprocating, a good relationship could be lost.

This is true for a lot of personalities we like as people. I know that there are people that I couldn't date simply because it wasn't worth the pursuit when I didn't have mutual feelings and actions that they did, whether they liked me or didn't like me. And since no one wants to be burned, they will avoid someone that doesn't show commonality in them at it's earliest signs. Now granted, some people are terrible at interpretations signs or expressions that show their interest, and some are terrible at showing the signs. But when it all comes down to it, conformity is the best option.

I am currently involved with a girl that has an almost identical personality and interests that I do. There are no awkward moments, if so, they are on purpose for entertainment and laughing. And the interest is mutual. I feel like this is how things are supposed to be, and I hope that you have enjoyed hearing about what makes people like each other.

What makes people like each other? Part 2

What makes an appealing personality?

Birds of a feather flock together? Or Opposites attract? Or in other words, are we attracted to people that are the most like we are as individuals? Or people that are most different from our personality. 

You have seen them, couples that seemingly exist to directly oppose everything about the other in personality. This couple, for example, could have a really shy guy with the most outgoing girl in the world. Like the guy acts like Shamoo in public while the girl doesn't say a word. Then you have the couple that are extremely alike. A couple that are so much alike that they seem like they are brother and sister. But not in a creepy way, I know what you are thinking. Now, I want you to think about someone that you have liked before or someone you have or do like in a relationship. What was it that brought you to like them? So the answer... Research shows that birds of a feather flock together on this one. Why? Just because a shy person isn't as social as their outgoing partner, it doesn't mean that they don't enjoy being social. They just may not have the social skills the other one has. So someone's skills do not always show their interests. It's kind of like me with my singing, I'm no Justin Bieber, but I'll still sing anywhere... Work when I am in an aisle in the store with a little dancing going on; school when I am passing people on campus; the shower; in the car when I'm passing other people and they are watching me jam out.

A like-able personality

This one comes from the realm of security. An insecure person can behave in a plethora of ways. 1) Lack of trust: This is someone that has to have all the information about you, but doesn't let any info escape from their mouth about them. 2) Ambivalent or an imbalance of attention: CLINGY! This person most likely had a life of  an unbalanced love relationship. Sometimes they get the attention, most of the time they don't. So they thrive on the moments they feel loved. Therefore, in a relationship they could be clingy because they want that attention all the time. Of course, this isn't the only reason this attachment happens, and isn't permanent either. Any of these attachments can be changed. Where are you? What are you doing now? How about now? Let's hang out... FOREVER! 3) Abusive: Fight for your right. The top dog gets the meal. If you wonder why someone can handle a relationship like this, or have met someone that keeps going back to the same jerk. It depends but most likely they want the protection, but it comes at a price. Now, finally a secure attachment to the other: This is a very like-able, trust-worthy, trusting, dependable person. They feel loved and have no problem loving others. This is the one that is attractive! But you won't usually find the combination of the hot guy in the HUGE TRUCK. You gotta be willing to see them inside the person, not in the truck. But if someone you know, or if you act like one of these, it can be changed! There is always an underlying problem that makes someone insecure that can be fixed.

Preferences

There isn't much that explains what makes you like certain characteristics. Most if it is learned behavior. I'll give ya a look into my preferences. My old celebrity crush used to be Kate Beckinsale. Hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot. I was into brunettes for so long! But now I'm more of a Heather Graham guy, (Sorry, I just watched Austin Powers) So I switched to blondes out of nowhere. And I have always been an eye type of guy. If the girl has big blue eyes, I'm done. Anyway, enough about me. Some people like nose rings, feet, elbows, any of those random things. I once met a guy that liked it when girls had ear lobes....It was weird but just sayin. But this is how it is with personality also. Find out what you like. How open they are, motivated, independent, selfless, nice, controlling. Maybe your into weirdos.Whatever it is, make it count. 

I am done with this one, it's kinda long and boring but I hope it helps answer some questions or ignite new questions. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I appreciate comments and ideas.